It All Comes Down to This
by SamanthaLisaWalkerfan101
Summary: Angela is having a really hard time. Takes place immediately after the Season 1 Finale.


Angela Rizzoli tried to take a deep breath. Her life was falling apart at the seams. Everything she had ever worked for in her life was disappearing. She felt like a failure. She felt like crying.

Her whole world had been turned upside down and shaken to its core. It seemed that her life was just a series of mistakes that kept piling up until the stack eventually collapsed, leaving her behind in the destruction.

She had gotten married too young. That had been her first mistake. She had had dreams once, aspirations of making it big. She was going to go to college and become a lawyer. Her daddy always said that with her attitude, she would make one hell of an attorney. She was planning on being a prosecution lawyer, her mind filled with grand scenes of her putting the criminals behind bars. Of course, in that day in age, women really were not given much consideration. There was no way she was ever going to actually become some hotshot attorney. She knew that now, just like she had known it then. And that was what had made meeting Frank Rizzoli perfect. He had come in and swept her off of her feet.

Frank had been a different man back then, when he was younger. He was not so concerned with money. He cared about the world. He did not laugh at her when she shared her dreams with him, her desire to change the world. In fact, he had told her that it was courageous and brave of her, so kind. He had agreed and vowed to accompany her along the way.

Before she knew it, she was married and pregnant. Frank had taken over his father's plumbing business and that was the start of the end of everything. She hated having to admit now that her mother had been right.

Angela had the baby, a baby girl. She named her Jane, after her favorite grandmother. Her dreams shifted in the months preceding the girl's birth. She was going to be the best mother in the world, and God knows she tried her hardest. First with Jane, but the girl was just so stubborn. Always defiant, never doing what she was told. She too had big dreams of saving the world, except unlike Angela, she actually did it and became a police officer, putting her life in danger. It was something her mother admired, her tenacity, her spirit. But it was also something she resented. Not only was her baby girl in danger every single day, but she got to live out her dream the way Angela never did.

And to top it all off, her other two children weren't much better. Frankie Jr., God love him, followed in his sister's footsteps and became a seeker of justice. That meant two of her babies were recklessly risking their lives for the greater good. And Tommy, well, Tommy was just a mess. In and out of jail. Petty crimes. Ever since he was a teenager. She blamed his father. He was never home, especially once Tommy was born. Unlike Jane and Frankie, Tommy never had a strong father figure in his life. Sure, Frank was there, but he was working all of the time.

Now, Frank had left her. He had told her one day that he wanted a divorce. She had laughed at the time. She knew it was not a joke. Frank was serious. Always had been. Never said anything he didn't mean. It was just that she should have seen it coming. They weren't happy. Hadn't been for a while, yet she still felt blindsided by the revelation, the action. He wanted a divorce, to leave her, alone.

And she would be alone. Her babies were grown up. Tommy in jail. Jane and Frankie devoted to their careers. Workaholics, just like their father. No grandchildren to speak of. Alone. No skills, really, so she couldn't get a job. It was just her.

They kept talk of the divorce quiet, of course. No need to worry the kids over it. Frank came to Sunday night dinners just like always. And since Jane and Frankie were always working, they didn't notice their father's things subtly disappearing from the house.

Then Jane got shot and Frankie was injured. A hostage situation at the police station. Her worst fears being realized. Her children were hurt.

She was at the hospital now. In the waiting room. She was waiting for any news on her children's conditions. The doctors had told her an hour ago that Frankie was stable, but that Jane was still in the dark. She was scared. She was angry. She was sad. She was lost.

Her life was over. It was this moment that she realized it. She had to try to start over. She could not keep dwelling on the past. If and when Frankie and Jane pulled through, she would tell them about the divorce. She would pick the pieces of her broken life up off of the floor and try to fix them.

Frank entered the door then, the second after she had mentally made her resolution. He rushed over to her and hugged her tightly. He was worried about his children too. She told him what happened. Whispered her fears, scared that if she said them any louder, they would come true. He stroked her hair, just like he used to, and comforted her. Told her everything would be alright. But she knew that it wouldn't be. Whether or not their kids made it out of the hospital alive, nothing would ever be alright again. She would be divorced. She would remember what it felt like, sitting in the hospital alone, scared to death that her children were dying and knowing that there was nothing she could do about it. She would have to live in fear that it would happen again, because her kids were too stubborn to quit their jobs after something like this and settle down.

And that's when it happened. She cried. She couldn't pretend everything was fine. She couldn't pretend that she was strong. Not anymore. Not after everything. She finally broke down, and Frank pulled away from her.


End file.
